More Unforgettable Faith Lessons to Do with Your Kids

Tim Shoemaker: I firmly believe that God gives us a responsibility to train our children in His ways. And that's a huge responsibility. What Focus on the Family did was give us the resources to do it.
Jim Daly: I'm Jim Daly. When we work together, we can transform our nation one family at a time. Make a monthly pledge today at focusonthefamily.com/family.
Guest (Male): This program is sponsored by Focus on the Family, helping families thrive in Christ for more than 40 years.
John Fuller: This is John Fuller, and please remember to let us know how you're listening to these programs on a podcast, app, or website.
Tim Shoemaker: There's worse things than our kids thinking learning about God is fun. I mean, when Jesus sent Peter to go get the temple tax, go fishing and look in the fish's mouth. Come on, he was having some fun with him, wasn't he?
Jim Daly: It is a little bit weird.
Tim Shoemaker: I would think so. You know, he's just messing with him a little bit and having some fun. And Peter learned a lesson he never forgot: God can provide in ways we can't imagine.
John Fuller: That's Tim Shoemaker, and he's with us today on Focus on the Family, helping you to find creative ways to share your faith with your kids. Thanks for joining us. I'm John Fuller.
Jim Daly: You know, John, all of us as parents, we want to equip our children to know the Lord, to live for the Lord, to give their lives to the Lord, right? And it starts with our consistency of our own walk with the Lord, and then how we are passing that on to our children. And it can become difficult. Where do we find those moments where a child goes, "Ah, that was awesome"? And today's guest, we're going to talk about how to create devotionals that your kids will remember, that make an impact, because you've thought it through. And certainly, our guest, Tim, has thought it through. And you can get a copy of this book, and it will help you to better do your devotional time. I'm excited about the discussion.
John Fuller: I am as well. And Tim Shoemaker is an author, speaker, and writing coach. And the book you're mentioning, Jim, is called *The Very Best, Hands-On, Kinda Dangerous Family Devotions*. Got to love the title. And this is Volume 2, so we're so glad to have Tim back in the studio with us.
Jim Daly: Tim, welcome back. Good to have you.
Tim Shoemaker: Glad to be here. Thanks so much, Jim.
Jim Daly: A lot of parents, like I said, they want to pass on their faith to their children, but they're not always sure what connects. I mean, I remember that. I did the toothpaste one. I remember doing that little devotional: squeeze out the toothpaste, then have the boys try to put it back, and it's impossible. And then you parlay that into: that's how our words are spoken. You can't put them back once they come out, they're out there. And I think that was one that connected for the boys. But there is this challenge, especially age-appropriate challenge, where kids need the tactile experience, like, how do we put this together? And I guess it comes down to that question, how did you come up with the idea of using what you call "dangerous" devotions? Every child is going to go, "I want to do that! Dangerous devotions!"
Tim Shoemaker: Well, as a father of three boys, and then even working volunteer with youth as the years went on with my wife, to hold their attention, that was really a challenge. And so that was really what was driving it is: what can you do to get their attention? And then you follow that with a little nugget of truth and they just sort of etch together in their mind. But yeah, they're involved in some activity, they wonder where you're going with it, and they're just having fun with it.
Jim Daly: Part of the problem, Tim, I think in the parenting role, we don't get a manual to say, "This is the best way to parent." I would say there are some great curriculums that people should look at. And Focus on the Family has plenty of material for you. But in that regard, the devotional time, the purist is going to think, "I need it to be structured, heavily structured. We're going to do three minutes of an opening song, 'Jesus Loves Me This I Know.' We're going to move then..." And we kind of make it like a church service. And that may not connect with the kids according to their age, eight years old, ten years old. Action is a good thing and really doing something with their hands is also a good thing. Speak to the parent that might struggle with that. They're more structured, and they don't see the benefit of what they might perceive as play. Why, during a devotion, would you encourage the children to play? This is serious, Tim. Speak to that parent's heart to say, "No, loosen up a little bit, make it fun, and it will stick."
Tim Shoemaker: You know, maybe even to take a page from Jesus' ministry, the greatest teacher ever. And yet God in all His wisdom, He gave us one recorded sermon, only one, even though He was speaking all the time. But He gave us lots of stories. He gave us lots of these visuals that Jesus did. And really, every time He healed somebody, that was an object lesson. He got people involved in an activity, in a sense, and they were able to see it. And so Jesus used this, get people involved. He was teaching them lessons before they knew they were being taught. And I think that was the power of it, whereas today, once we sit them down, we try to, chances are they want to be bored or they're thinking about something else that they want to do next.
Jim Daly: What about the parents—and again, I'm just speaking on behalf of the parents I know, me being one of them—that we're assuming the kids are going to go to Sunday school, they're going to get all they need right there, and that's sufficient, versus saying, "No, they need sprinkling kind of like your lawn. You need to water it often so that the green growth is there." Spiritually speaking, we as parents need to water spiritual truth into our children's hearts so that the effect, the impact is there. What about that parent that leans just too much on the church?
Tim Shoemaker: The church isn't there enough. The church will let their kids down. Their church won't be there in the middle of the night when they really need to talk. And so if you're establishing some spiritual conversations with your kids, it becomes easier to talk more about spiritual things as time goes on. And that Sunday school teacher may be there for a year or two in their life and then they're gone or whatever. And they do great work and that's wonderful. We love that. We just want more. They augment what we are doing because we're there all the time, like you said with the lawn.
Jim Daly: The watering of the lawn, I like that. You share a story about a dad who started doing devotions with his sons that eventually turned into something much bigger. What was that story out of your book and how did it impact people?
Tim Shoemaker: You know, I think that was one where there was a dad I had met him at a conference and he picked up the books. He's starting to do devotions with his kids, and he had boys and they were loving it. Well, he was telling other dads about it, and then that was right when COVID hit. And COVID hit and suddenly their church closed, but he was able to still do these devotions. Well, he's talking to other dads. That grew into a weekly group where they met outside in his lawn of 45 dads and kids. And they would take turns doing these devotions and it was some sort of an activity and then they would tie a nugget of truth in. And they said that was just super effective.
Jim Daly: That idea of dangerous devotions, A, what are you achieving there and why do kids love this edgy stuff? And then it sticks. They'll remember that for a lifetime compared to something that, let me just say, could be boring and they won't remember it.
Tim Shoemaker: We were just driving last weekend back from a men's conference and I can't tell you a ton about that drive. It was a nice drive. But we saw an accident happen in the lane next to us. This moment of, "Whoa!" Car went off into the ditch onto the oncoming lanes and he was able to swerve off without hitting anybody. That was like, "Oh my goodness," he hydroplaned.
Jim Daly: You remembered that.
Tim Shoemaker: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And it was this moment of that increased heartbeat, a little bit of adrenaline. When we incorporate even a little bit of that in our devotions where, "Okay, we're by a campfire here. We're going to do something," that makes a difference. So I've got like this one here where you can take something like Coffeemate, a non-dairy creamer, and you throw that on a fire and you get a great big...
Jim Daly: Oh, really? That stuff's flammable? Should we be drinking it?
Tim Shoemaker: I tell you what! Well, I'm sorry, I just never knew that. Don't smoke it then. Just toss the rest into the fire now.
Tim Shoemaker: As long as you're not smoking. It goes up in smoke. Oh, yeah, big flame. And so it's very exciting.
Jim Daly: Thank you, by the way, for not demonstrating that here in the studio. So let me ask you though, how do you attach that to a biblical principle? The fact that Coffeemate goes up in smoke.
Tim Shoemaker: Okay, so you take a handful of it, right? And you throw that on the fire. You create this big thing. It is in your hand, Jim. It is in your power to create this great big burst or not, depending if you throw that on. Same thing, let's say when our kids are having conversations at home. It's in their power to make a big flame and make a big blow up or not. It's in our hands to do that. Bible tells us a soft answer turns away wrath, right? A gentle word. And we want to encourage our kids, and sometimes instead of just saying, "Hey, talk nice," take them out to a campfire, get some Coffeemate, and we do this little demonstration.
Jim Daly: This is like our words. That is good. I love that.
Tim Shoemaker: It's fun.
Jim Daly: I'm sorry we're not camping anymore. I would have done it this weekend and thrown the whole bottle on it.
Tim Shoemaker: Oh, yeah, stand back.
Jim Daly: Your brother-in-law and his wife recently saw the impact of these types of devotional lessons, which is great. What happened with that experience? What did they walk into?
Tim Shoemaker: My brother-in-law Jim, he's a pastor down in Florida and he had done a devotional with the kids. It was with elementary kids years ago. And he had done this one demo that's a variation of what's in the book. And then his wife was going to be doing the youth group just a week or so ago. And so he had said, "Hey, you know, we'll have you do this one. It's this cool chemical thing and let's do this." And so she does it. Well, she just starts it and one of the girls in the class goes, "Oh, I know that one." And she's like, "Well, tell me, what was the point?" And the girl was able to give it. And when they looked back, it was like ten years earlier that Jim had given that devotional when she was in elementary school, and now in high school, she still remembered it.
Jim Daly: Oh, yeah, that's the point. I mean, that's actually the evidence of what we're talking about.
Tim Shoemaker: Yes, yes.
Jim Daly: Let me also say, not every parent is the same. We have a spectrum of personality, God's bouquet of flowers. So some parents are going to be more engineering-minded. Then you have other colorful parents that are always excited about everything. But within that, for the parents that may feel intimidated in doing some of this—it could go wrong. Tim, I mean, it could blow my hand off, that coffee powder. I mean, you can rationalize not doing it for lots of reasons. How do you encourage that parent that's a little more hesitant to do something like this? It takes time, it takes effort, you've got to think about it. But what do you say to that more reserved parent who may not get it?
Tim Shoemaker: Sure. Well, with the book, we're going to walk them through it. We realized that some are going to feel like that. So we're going to walk them through it. We're going to encourage them to try it once ahead of time and they're going to feel more confident. But when they get their kids' reactions, oh man, that's going to move them past a lot of hurdles because they're going to see how engaged they were and how good that went. And they're going to think about that later and say, "Wow."
John Fuller: That's a great point. And what a fascinating conversation today on Focus on the Family with Jim Daly. We've got Tim Shoemaker in the studio and he's telling us just a little bit about the many different ideas—52 activities contained in his book, *The Very Best, Hands-On, Kinda Dangerous Family Devotions, Volume 2*. We'll encourage you to get a copy of the book from us here at the ministry. When you get in touch, make a donation as you can, we'll send the book to you. Our number is 800, the letter A, and the word family. Or stop by focusonthefamily.com/broadcast.
Jim Daly: Tim, I want to share a story, it's so funny. So we bought this experiment from Hobby Lobby and it's where you connect these little test tubes with a metal strip with a battery cable, little 9-volt battery thing that sets up. And overnight you submerge these and hydrogen gas builds in the upside-down test tube, which is rocket fuel. So the next day, you light the rocket fuel and kaboosh, it's like this big flame. And it's so much fun. But I left it on the counter the next night. And Jean and I went off to dinner. It was a Jewish-Christian dialogue dinner at the Broadmoor. And the phone rings and we can't get to it. So our youngest at that time, Troy, who was probably seven, leaves this message. Let me play it for you.
Troy: Hi, Mommy. Trenten actually was dumb enough to get the battery, put my tongue on, and the mini jump cables, and actually plug it into the DVD player and it caused smoke. But don't worry, it did not start a fire. This is Troy. And by the way, Trent did it, okay? Okay. Have I been specific enough? Okay, bye. Oh, besides, don't go easy on Trent.
Jim Daly: I mean, is that a catastrophe or what? But here's the lesson I learned: put the experiments away if you're not going to be at home.
Tim Shoemaker: That is true. Hey, and you know what? If there's anything dangerous, seriously, if we had anything that was considered dangerous, we tell the kids, "Hey, this is a little bit dangerous that we're working with, and Dad will do it anytime you want, but don't be playing with this on your own!"
Jim Daly: I love the younger brother there though. "Don't go easy on Trent." And so it's just so funny. You also tackle serious topics in your devotionals, like dating and gratitude and family conflict. Man, those can be kind of really hard for parents to plan a dangerous devotional around those topics. How can those topics become fun devotionals?
Tim Shoemaker: Well, the dating one just popped in my mind just as you said that. So one of the big things with kids is we're stressed and we only want them to date a Christian. And that could be a hard thing. "Why can't I go out with someone? We're just going out for fun," or whatever it would be. And so we run a little three-legged race. So we've got two of our kids and we tie their legs together using a scarf, whatever, tie together. And we have them run a little obstacle course and we time them and it'll take them however many seconds it did. Now you run the same course, same two people again, tied together, but one is facing forward and one is facing backwards. Time them again, and that time's going to be a whole lot different, a lot longer, okay? And now we can transition to that truth. Hey, you know what? You can feel just as close to someone whether they're a Christian or not, just like whether you're facing the same way or different ways. You're just as close, but it can only be for a short period of time. It's going to impact you in that marathon race of life of being married. Which way do you want to go through marriage, facing the same direction or a different direction? There's a great verse, I want to say it's Galatians 5, and it talks about the flesh desiring one thing in your life and the spirit desiring another. And when you put that together, you're going to have a real mismatch. And imagine if there was a race in life, there was a million-dollar prize if they made it in a certain amount of time, and it was a three-legged race, which way would they want to do that? I think they'd want to face together after that little exercise. And the same thing goes with talking about marriage and the people that we would date. We have to make sure that they're facing the same direction or we're never going to get there to that great relationship we want.
Jim Daly: You know, the thing that is amazing, and this is so true with good devotionals like these, you think you're just doing this to teach your children. And what ends up happening is you're right in the lesson with them, learning something about yourself.
Tim Shoemaker: Yes. There was a time our boys were young and my wife and I had had a business. You remember the One Hour Photo labs and studios?
Jim Daly: It's vaguely familiar.
Tim Shoemaker: Yeah, yeah. And so we closed our business in 2004. There was just no need for it anymore. Technology overcame it. Yeah, we were losing our shirt. And so I took the boys on this little mystery ride. And so basically they were blindfolded and we made three stops. And the whole idea is they kept their blindfold on. We get to the first stop, "Okay, boys, lift up your blindfold, write down where you think we are. Don't tell your brothers. We're going to see how many you get right." And my objective as a dad: fool them. That's all I wanted to do was fool them. And sure enough, when we'd done these three stops, then we went to a little fast food place afterwards and said, "Okay, what did you have in your list? First place, second place, third place." And as soon as you see a place they didn't know exactly where you were, and then, "Were you scared? Did you feel like jumping out of the car? Did you feel like wrestling the wheel away from Dad, finding your way?" "No, no!" Because Dad was at the wheel. Dad knew what he was doing. And it was an opportunity to say, "You know what? This is like life. There's going to be times you don't know where you're at, why you're there, and you don't know where you're going next. Just like you trusted Dad, we've got to trust God because He knows all those things. He's at the wheel. You trust Him." And boy, I tell you what, that was ministering to the kids, but that was just exactly what I needed at that time because I was in that spot. I had no idea what it was going to look like next.
Jim Daly: Yeah, that is so good. You know, I can imagine that kind of dangerous devotional—which we're talking about—especially eight, nine, ten-year-olds, but also thirteen, fourteen-year-olds. They will twenty, thirty years later remember that in that moment when something has happened, that that was exactly the object lesson all those years ago. "Man, I need to remember the Lord's in control here."
Tim Shoemaker: Exactly. That's exactly right. It gets embedded in their heart. It's not so much we talked in the beginning about sitting down and having that deep conversation with our kids and they're processing through their head there, through their logic center, they're taking it in there. But when we have an activity, boy, that becomes a heart thing and that truth just gets etched in.
Jim Daly: I don't want to get away—for the YouTube watchers again, we see dice and pretzels. What are they about?
Tim Shoemaker: Well, there's some times you can run like—you remember like that *Minute to Win It* type games? They'd have all kinds of crazy games and you'd be—you have a minute and see how well you do. Well, you run some *Minute to Win It* games with your kids. So one is you can put solo cups on your hands and you have to stack dice up. And so you have to see how many dice you can stack up in so many seconds, right? Or another one is you take like a chopstick, right? And you hold that in your mouth and you put a bunch of these pretzels—circle pretzels or the twisty pretzels—in a bowl, and they've got to try to hook as many as you can in that minute. And of course, it's lots of fun, we can have fun with these games. But then we can transition to that spiritual truth that we'd probably be better at any of these if we had more practice, right? The first time through we're terrible at it. And it's the same thing through with many of the spiritual things. Prayer, trusting God, shedding anxiety. These are not easy things to do if we never put them into practice. But as we practice them, we're going to get better and better and that's part of the Christian life: we don't just try to pull these things out when we need them. We're practicing this all the time.
Jim Daly: You know, one of the great attributes, I believe, in the human experience is this idea of humor, being able to laugh at oneself. It's so critical because in it is humility. And you know, when you're doing that, I'm sure hopefully healthy enough that you're going to laugh at yourself with your inability to stack dice, with your inability to scoop up pretzels on a chopstick. And I mean, that really is the underlying lesson, I think, one of: this idea that you aren't as good as you think you are. And that's a good thing, it's rooted in humility and experienced that way. Tim, let's land here with this idea of parents who have left it to the church, they're fairly formal, let's say. And what I mean by that is a little more stoic. They're not excitement-type parents. We're not looking for "dangerous devotions." But the benefit of this, even for that parent to break out of their cast and take themselves a little less seriously to do things like this, to have fun with their children zero to 18 (or probably about four to 18—it gets a little more complicated for teenagers, but you can still do this). Speak to those parents to say, "Turn over a new leaf, give it a run, help your children to better understand spiritual truths through these kind of experiments." Make your pitch to the parent that's never done this and has never thought about it.
Tim Shoemaker: Okay. So you know what? If they're doing—maybe they're doing something on a daily basis, I'd say keep doing it. Keep doing exactly what you're doing. But once a week, swap it out. Once a week do something more active because sometimes our kids are tuning us out, their mind drifts, and we're not even aware of it because they're acting pretty good. But you can't check out of some sort of activity that you're having. And so once a week do it because one way or another, we want to use different methods to impact their heart and to help them remember God's truth. So sometimes they can do it where they sit down and they have a very serious lesson, but swap it out sometimes and do some of these fun things. And in the long run, Proverbs talks about, "Cast your bread on the waters." It's talking about different ways of doing things. Don't just put all your eggs in one basket, try some other methods because one's going to stick.
Jim Daly: And Tim, here's the thing that I've learned: don't make parenting complicated because then you get discouraged and you stop doing the right things. But doing these kinds of things are simple things, fun things, they're not anti-biblical. I mean, this is like the full flavor of God's treat for us to live this life. And we remember these things. And what a joy to be able to do this.
Tim Shoemaker: Right! There's worse things than our kids thinking learning about God is fun. I mean, when Jesus sent Peter to go get the temple tax, "Go fishing and look in the fish's mouth." Come on, he was having some fun with him, wasn't he? He's messing with him a little bit and having some fun. And Peter learned a lesson he never forgot: God can provide in ways we can't imagine.
Jim Daly: Well, again, Tim, these are such practical good ideas that a parent of children of all ages right there can do these things and have fun. I'm so grateful for your direction to help us and for the great book, *The Very Best, Hands-On, Kinda Dangerous Family Devotions*. I mean, one, the title's fantastic. But thank you for being with us today and helping us in this way.
Tim Shoemaker: I'm glad to be here.
Jim Daly: And let me turn to you, our listener. I hope you know Focus on the Family is here for you. As you're raising the next generation, we're here to help. We can answer your questions, offer trusted guidance, and walk with you through this parenting journey. One helpful resource we'd love to share with you is Focus on the Family's Age & Stage newsletters. Each week, you'll receive a short email tailored to your child's age and stage, offering practical, biblically-grounded insights to help you parent with confidence in that age range. We also have Tim's fun book, *The Very Best, Hands-On, Kinda Dangerous Family Devotions, Volume 2*. It will help you build lasting faith through memorable moments. Each activity is designed to spark meaningful conversations and help plant God's word deep in your child's heart. And when you make a monthly pledge today, a gift of any amount, we'll send you a copy of Tim's devotional book as our way of saying thank you. And I want to share this with you as well. We recently heard from a listener named Mary who wrote to us and told us this: "I grew up in a dysfunctional family and realized I wanted to parent differently. So I started listening to Focus on the Family more than 25 years ago and soaked up everything I could. Today, my two daughters are married and they've blessed me with seven grandchildren who are following the Lord. I'll be supporting Focus on the Family until I'm in heaven." Doesn't get better than that. What a note and what a commitment. That's the kind of ministry that you can do through Focus on the Family. You are helping to change lives. As a nonprofit ministry, we depend on your financial support. If you aren't already a member of our Friends of Focus on the Family program, I want to urge you to consider doing so. We've set a goal this month to find 1,200 people to join a community of monthly sustainers who care deeply about families. And I hope you can be one of them. Your monthly gift will help us provide resources to meet the needs of families and help them heal through Christ. And right now we want to say thank you in a special way. When you commit to $30 or more a month, we'll send you a Focus on the Family with Jim Daly travel mug—along with a 4-ounce bag of my very own coffee blend, the same one we enjoy here in the studio with our guests. If Focus on the Family has encouraged you or your family, take a moment to partner with us. Your support means changed lives, stronger families, and a brighter future. And if you can't make that monthly commitment, we'll send you a copy of Tim's book for a one-time gift as well.
John Fuller: Yes, sign up for those Age & Stage emails and to become a monthly sustainer, donate, and get your copy of *The Very Best, Hands-On, Kinda Dangerous Family Devotions, Volume 2*. Well done. When you call 800, the letter A, and the word family. Or stop by our website and that's focusonthefamily.com/broadcast. And join us next time as we hear from counselor Deborah Fileta. She'll help you develop your people skills so you can better show God's love to others.
Deborah Fileta: And oftentimes what we're told to do in our culture and society is when we're triggered, we're told to back away, cut that person out of your life, no contact, isolate, withdraw from them. But what if triggers were actually God's way of revealing what He wanted to heal inside of us?
John Fuller: Thanks again for listening to Focus on the Family with Jim Daly. I'm John Fuller, inviting you back as we once more help you and your family thrive in Christ.